

I downloaded a Sim-Scully and Sim-Mulder. I happened across one of the many The Sims fan sites and uncovered X-Files skins. This was just way too weird, like something from the X-Files. Instead, she tickled Sim-Mom while she burned. I sent Sim-daughter over to assist, but a child cannot use a fire extinguisher. Sim-Ty came to the rescue to extinguish the flames. On the lighter side, my Sim-Wife caught herself on fire while cooking.

But was she simply playing the game or did she really want to revitalize our marriage? Was I getting the two confused? I felt guilty for trying to seduce Sim-Babe (especially for betraying my brother, who remained a loyal buddy). Perhaps this was the spark we needed to re-light the fire after ten years of marriage. She was keeping the house clean, had taken a few cooking classes, and appeared to really want this relationship to work. Not only that, but she had managed to get me promoted at work and had bought me a large-screen TV. The next day (in real life) I came home, started The Sims, and found (to my horror) that my real-world wife had patched things up between Sim-Ty and Sim-Wife. For years I've been complaining that she doesn't.

This was working out perfectly! Naturally, Sim-Wife got a bit angry at the budding romance, but she brought this on herself. Before long, Sim-Ty and Sim-Babe were sneaking away for kisses. Once Sim-Ty was in the house, Sim-Babe started making nice in the hot tub. I then took over my Sim-Brother's house and invited myself (Sim-Ty) over for dinner. This was fairly easy, as I made Sim-Mother-in-law exactly like the real-world-mother-in-law. I immediately took over the role of my sister-in-law and pissed off her Sim-Mom (take that!). I created a Sim mother-in-law that I didn't get along with, a Sim-brother with a Sim-babe of a wife, and a Sim-sister-in-law with a friendly Sim-boyfriend. I made a Sim wife similar to my real-world wife. In a moment of enlightenment, I decided to create a Sim family reflective of my real life.

Even when Child Protective Services took away that brat of a child (thank goodness), I never really found myself wrapped up in the game (and without my real-world bratty kid around, I have more time to play on the computer - just kidding). I can have all of that without turning on a computer. No matter how much I tried, I never felt in touch with my family. My Sim-family was not happy, the house was perpetually in need of cleaning, and nobody got along with each other. Days of Our LivesĪt first, The Sims struck me as an interesting academic exercise, but not much entertainment.
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Yet as you lie in your real bed all you can think about is cooking, bathing, watching more TV and going to work (with your Sim family) all the while planning tomorrow's real world activities of working, cooking, cleaning and watching TV and playing The Sims. After several hours of housework, cooking, bathing and watching TV, it's time to put the computer away and clean the house, grab a snack, take a shower and watch TV before turning in for the night. That, my friends, is exactly what playing The Sims feels like. Have you ever dreamed that you were working? You know the dream - you work and work and work, waking completely tired only to face nine hours of real work at your real job. After five hours of The Sims, I rise from the chair feeling depressed and unhappy with my meager existence, yet eager to play again. After playing five hours of Unreal Tournament I rise from the chair feeling slightly bouncy with a heightened sense of excitement. Which is a bit strange - The Sims is almost certainly not a game. If you enjoy an occasional foreign film and aren't already on anti-depressants, The Sims may be the perfect game for you. Young average-looking character faces insurmountable challenges, meets an angst-ridden girl/guy and one or both die. While this can be great entertainment, it's certainly not art. Young good-looking character challenges all odds yet manages to win the girl/guy and live happily ever after. Most movies coming out of Hollywood follow a familiar theme (no wonder John Grisham books are so easily translated). One: this game finally creates interactive French cinema and two: that we all live very sad TV lives. I have developed two analogies for understanding The Sims.
